unsolicited advice based on unspoken rules of online dating

I was married from twenty-one until my early thirties. My first boyfriend I had at 17, and I was a serial monogamist until my far-too-young-marriage. I've never been great at navigating the dating scene pre-2005, and my aforementioned marriage explains why I missed the gradual shift into online dating being a thing in the world.... Continue Reading →

my failed marriage & the subsequent two years: part 2 • someone else’s plus one

February 2016: “But it has to stop hurting so much, eventually, right?” I asked him.   The look on my face had to clearly be a desperate sadness, pathetically searching for hope—for him to say something to ground me, to ease my mind that this moment is only a hard moment in the grand scheme... Continue Reading →

my failed marriage & the subsequent two years: part 1 • making peace with the unanswerable

Recently, a well-intentioned kind human mentioned I should stop dwelling on these bad points in my life and move on to my brighter future (referring to several posts regarding my marriage and subsequent divorce). The thing is--I have moved on. (Or at lest I'm well into the process of moving on.) The fact that I'm... Continue Reading →

thirty-four at 34

I spent the majority of my thirty-third year of existence somehow convinced I was thirty-four.  I have no idea why. I asked Sam, who was born in a blizzard in rural Minnesota in February of 1984, how old she just turned amidst my absurd confusion. She sweetly replied, "Carlis, you are 33. Don't worry. I... Continue Reading →

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